Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I smell like Dick and happiness
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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