Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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