Your face is a jimmy john
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
