and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize