Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize