Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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