You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
