Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Randomize
