sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
