you would pick up someone in the library
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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