Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
