I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
