I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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