the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
