Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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