so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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