I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
she peed on how many people?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
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