Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
