Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize