wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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