I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
