some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Randomize
