I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
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