good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
