Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
