ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
