when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
