i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize