Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize