Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
