My liver just broke up with me...
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Blood and glitter go together right?
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
