I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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