Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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