Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
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