I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
