just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize