Me. At least after what I've been through.
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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