She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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