It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
