No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
