You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
