This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
