I wanna passion pit in your ass
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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