i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
