We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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