He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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