Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
