My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
