he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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