i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Also, beer. Big fan.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Randomize
