Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
