hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Randomize
